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TOMB OF MY YOUTHFUL HEART’S DESIRE
- 2022 - MERY GATES - NEW YORK, NY -
Printed Circuit Board, Electronics, Reclaimed Wood, Silvergleam Solder, Magic: The Gathering Trading Card (Glacial Chasm), Personal Computer Subwoofers, Projection
A series of physical modeling heartbeat synthesizers, clock synced with looped historical footage.
In my youth I saw only beauty, until Glacial Chasm broke my heart.
“When I was 14 years old I was a semi-professional Magic: The Gathering player. It was the most dedicated and focused I’ve ever been on anything. I believed in the game with the kind of monomaniacal fervor that only youth makes possible. It was the final round of SCG Open Dallas, with thousands in prize money and a first place trophy on the line. I was playing the final game of the match, and I had my opponent on the ropes. I attacked with all my creatures, presenting lethal damage. But then, the judges stopped the game. In my haste to seal my victory, I had not sacrificed Glacial Chasm, a card which states players cannot attack. I received a technical rules violation for attacking with it in play. The penalty was game loss and disqualification from the tournament. An event which should have been the crowning achievement of my career was instead a devastating blow. I lost heart and my focus suffered. Mixed with the inevitable process of growing up, I began to view my passion as a dead end. I turned my back on Magic, putting this truest of all desires away with other childish things, until now.”
Tomb of My Youthful Heart’s Desire is an installation piece built around a series of custom electronic reliquary objects, each of which functions as a generative heartbeat audio synthesizer, with the card Glacial Chasm entombed in solder amid the circuitry. Heartbeat audio is synchronized with a projection of original 2009 press footage from the final tournament match, speeding up to a frantic pace and eventually breaking when the final game loss is delivered, creating a requiem for the loss of a passion that only youthful innocence could sustain.